Random Time

Yeah hecka late blogging, aha. So today i walked this certain person to class and it's always so awkward, like we have nothing to talk about and it makes me feel so dumb and i act hella weird in front of this person and yeah...Just gives me butterflies :] don't wanna put myself out there to get hurt AGAIN, cause that always seems to happen these days. so i hope tomorrow will be better!

My good friend like stopped talking to me and i don't know why it's kinda weird and whatever cause i mean they just don't wanna hurt me that's what they kept saying, but you see they're really not hurting me at all. Not talking to me at all is hurting more then anything else you could ever do. I wish none of my bullshit would have happened so we could still be close haha oprah and lil'kim or penguin and piggy :] I just always regret the things i say after i say them and wish with all my heart i can take them back.But i guess that's life ya know you just get stronger and shit, but you always have that feeling of " damn i wanna be there friend and your missing out on what they're doing in their life" IDK? it's hard to explain like you wanna be there but you can't. All i can do is keep breathing :]

[EDIT]Ughh i really don't know i can't really regulste peoples life's for them but i mean when people have the same friends aas me and flirt with them it makes me sad kinda like im not good enough and stuff. Knowing peoples history isn't good at all either. i'm just so UGH! i can't really focus and crap it just bugs me but i don't know why? i guess it's a problem i have. i just can't handle the fact that people that i care about don't want to talk to me anymore and yeah! it's hard but i have to live with it once again. IDK i guess people always go through me to find other friends then we end up having a mutual frind and it gets all bad =/
blah but imma try to stay positive cause that's all i can do :]