Waaaaht?

Nothing too big going on right now besides T.O ahha can't wait...I hope i get in, Ms.Harris is a bitch anyway. I don't understand why she's going out of her way to keep one kid from being involed in the schools activities. Our themem this year is hella crackin' More memories to add to Junior year (; Military Ball is soon And i'm stressing out, ihg. Hope everything goes according to plan. I also have no junior prom date.... I need to find one. Time is running out pooowhooo!

So far the things i gave up for lent are going great and i really don't have the urge to do any of them! that makes me feel good and i have more time to reflect on life and just get more shit for school done.Another thing is my teacher is writing me a scholarship (: so happy about that. well thats it!

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So blogging at school (; first period T.A hella boring. So yesterday was a good day went to church and then Katies mom invited us over for waffles! They were good. Then i just went home after and did laundry and stuff for military ball. My damn monitor wasn't turning on, it was weird so had to go without the computer for a day....Oh well. I was thinking this morning to myself and something is missing, i don't know what but something is defintely missing. I can just feel the vibe running through my empty body. It's gonna drive me crazy for a couple days though. haha so that's about it hope this week is a great one (;

realizations

Why do people act the way they act? Why do people put others feelings on the line to be broken? I don't know the answer to these questions and i don't think i ever will. Eventually i'll learn and grasp why people do what they do in certain situations, cause i'll have more experience and know what to kinda expect from people. Why do people let those kind of people in their lives? The feeling of having someone that your crushing on is the greatest feeling in the world and when the feeling is mutual it's even better. Just knowing someone out there cares for you means alot. When that's taken away it feels even worss as if your heart chipped of a little and will never repair. In the moment you feel so helpless and resentful that you allowed yourself to be hurt, but give it time you'll feel tons better i tell myself. Just at the moment there's nothing else you wanna do but soak, soak in a tub of regret and your too lazy to get out until someone else comes along. Doesn't mean your dependent, it just means You like to cohabitate with people and you love having that special person in your life.They come and go But when will the one that will stay stroll down my street? Nobody knows..Love is unexpected, fligs are expected thats what i say. How do you like someone so quickly? It's not immature to develop feelings for someone in a day it's you being optimistic and taking a chance. if your diggin someone then why waste it, just go for it. Some may call it infatuation; and it is, but eventually it makes it way from a little seed to a big plant of love.Getting over people is hard, if you have someone you cared for and it's over your always gonna have something with them no matter what you say and do and your always gonna miss them and what you guys had. Like today i miss those conversations on the phone, don't take things for granted cause one day it will be gone, then you have to live with not having that one thing in your life. As we're young we want to enjoy and experience life we tend to date more and have more fligs when we're young. We are so indecisive and are not clear on what we want in life, as we get older we mature we see what we want in life and the people we want in it. How do we pick our close friends? I think a true friend would be considerate of you and what your going through. They're always there for you No matter what. I try to be that guy but it's hard at times. If you have that one friend that you can be yourself around and they are loyal to you...keep them cause good friends are hard to come by. Well I'm gonna be the person i wanted to be at the begining of the year. No bull shit anymore. I wanna change and be able to help someone/people..that would mean the world to me, just knowing you helped someone. Time for the change, hpe you guys like it (;

Re-Run

I'm baaaak, after hella days away. ahha this blog is pretty random just me and my thoughts. So I feel like crying right now but don't know why. So recently was valentine's day <333 and it was good. We had a rally and gabe Bondoc was there (; he was okay i guess. I gave the huge-ass card and balloon and cookies to That special person and they liked it , so that was good ;D I expected the worse. I was somewhat nervous and didn't know what to say, so i might have looked like a dumbass. I hungout with jonathan after school that was fun ahhaha. Man i missed that kiddo<3. I just felt like i was on cloud nine everything was going great. I even talked to EK online for the first time in like forever. I was so happy until i think today everything came rushing back to me like a huge wave full of David's problems. I just couldn't get my mind off of things and it sucks. I couldn't get outta my mind that EK lied to me and hurt me, uhhg. To top it off the person that liked me doesn't like me anymore, i don't even know why. They said it was "Different" whatever that means ideekay =/. I just can never met someone and stay close to them but oh well, their loss not mine.

i just wish that people can see the goodness and the love they have right in front of them instead of wasting it on a some dumbass fling. I'd be there for you when yed me the most. I'd never let you go and love you (; not like this people you date for like one month or whatever. I'd be different. I doubt that you liked me but it's bad to assume so i won't. I mean your excuses still stick with me today, i can't get them out of my head. They were hella lame and shit. Of course i wouldn't be okay with you moving i mean who would and I know we'd get along, BULLSHIT! It just hurts that you showed little compassion for me and my feelings. I'm not being like clingy or whatever but i'm just trying to express myself. I want you to be happy, but i want to be happy too and i'd be happiest with you<3.

Annnd you i don't even understand you, how is it different. I felt like crying a little but didn't wanna seem like a PUSSY. I mean I felt like Below your standards and everything. there was no reassurance there for me. I thought we clicked, but i guess not. I knew i shouldn't have developed feelings for you cause like you said you get over people easily. Guess i have to live with that. It just really made me sad. You need to figure out what you really want, uhhg.