Bento.

Went to mervyn's with Kevin and christmas shopped. Good sales, so i got a couple of things for my mom amd auntie. After about an hour kevin and i went to Bento to visit Laurelle and she hooked us up with free food =) it was yummy. Then we just chilled all day pretty much at mcdonalds. Some guy was staring at me and we were laughing cause it that. Over all pretty good/chill day. Why can't everyday be this relaxing?

So i don't know why that person asked me to the dance? but i hope i didn't hurt their feelings by asking "why?" i just wanted to know though. So yeah i don't know emotions are whacked right about now!

This Morning.

So i to the Great Mall at 11:30 and i was standing around waiting for Kevin and Adel, then BAM Aaron comes running up we hugged and he said "Let's cut with jonathan" and was like uuh okay =) Aaron and i went in line with our friend Jonathan Pham! he's cool. We were just talking and acting stupid and talking shit, ahha. So then Kevin and Adel came it got kinda awkward for me , i don't know why? So then Jonathan like just doesn't come back and he stays with his friends and i think i know why... it's okay buddy =D But then it was just Aaron and i. They opened the doors a little early and even one was hella screaming and just bolted for the damn door so Aaron and i were right there! he was the desingnated pusher. From there we ran to H&M and were like in the front of the gate ahha Stevens gay ass! Aaron and i saw some pretty cute people too! So the workers were being hella dumb and stuff. They opened the gate and Aaron went to his secret place while i got shirts, jackets, and other stuff not caring what size it was haha. i had like 16 things in my hands. I felt selfish, but hey it's black friday right? Me and Arron got fed up with the store so we went in line and i picked through my stuff. We seen his Cousin? i'm not too sure and he waited with us. Then Jonathan calls and says "i lost my money" i felt =/ that sucks. then he came and chilled in line for a second ahha with his yelling =D PMS is a bitch aye? funny kiddo. So we were just bitchin' with his sister Micah? ahhh and talking about indians. so we got our shit after 1 hour in line!!!! i got two jackets and two shirts. Then i split from Aaron and went with adel and kevin. We went to eat at the food court and i was kinda tired already. aaron called me and he met me up at the food court we chilled and stuff. then aaron left and we went to anchor blue and waited in line for and hour also. i got a vest and a nice sweater!! So we were bored and had to wait for serenity to get off of work. So we just walked around and it was like 4 something eeerrggh! red eye's are not attractive! ahha i seen ian working heehhee. then i went back to H&M and bought a bag i love it dude! and i seen Jonathan and we hung out for awhile. then i got starbucks, a lemonade shaking ice tea haha...PASSION! it was so good. then me and my friends went to McDonalds and yeah it was like almost 6 so me and Jonathan walked back to the movies and he left on light rail and i got picked up! ahha so i would say today was a pretty long ass day. But it had it's ups and downs, mostly ups though!

Yeah seeing Jonathan Pham was nice didn't expect him to be there =D and seeing random dumbasses from school was BLAH!

Ryan Tedder-The Look

Thanksgiving Day

It's early! So i rarely tell my friends what they mean to me
okay so i'll put clues with every single one so you know who you are without me saying so.

so here i go =)

1.Dude i love you so much. We've through alot the past three years, but we got through it and now we are the best of friends. Hold it for 10 seconds LOL! i could talk to you about anything without feeling dumb or uncomfortable. i will never take you for granted, so don't feel like i don't love you.i've had so many good times with you and i don't want those to stop. you are truely my best friend.
CLUE:SF!

2.Even though we barely hangout out i still love you. I'm so glad i met you freshmen year. you always cheer me up when i'm sad.we shall chill soon? i'm so thankful that you are just my friend even though we believe in totally different things. you're a bright girl who deserves better in life. invite me over to eat again! haha
CLUE:Vanessa Anne Hudgens.

3.I'm glad you're still my friend even though you found that one thing out about me. i'm so happy you stood right next to me, not ashamed. it's cool talking to you about mine and your problems in the morning when it's totally freezing outside. How we walk away when the white guy comes to the library! good times you are one of my great friends. best flip friend though.
CLUE:PeanutButter and jelly cracker sandwiches.

4.I can talk to you about alot and i can actually trust you. you are a great friend and i'm glad to have met you. You may love my bitchiness but i love your personality. You are so pure and honest. you're a kind hearted individual. I admire you. so does Mr.king! haha
CLUE:Amy.

5. even though we fight i still consider you a good friend. we had stupid moments but it only makes us who we are now.I'm glad that we have opened up to each other i feel like i can trust you more and i hope you feel the same. cause really you are a cool dude ...sometimes.
CLUE:Kick his face in.

6.it's been a year since we met and i don't feel a thing. that makes me sad cause we had something great and i let that go. sorry babe =/ but i'm glad that your here for me and i'm here for you too. I'm so sorry for alla the pain i but you through this past year, i was stupid and immature. But i was hurt too alot. I just want us to put this behind us and have a new clean friendship. without us hurting one another. but i do still care about you and for you<3
CLUE:Giraffes are cute, aren't they?

7.i've known you since freshmen year and i barely knew you. i think this year we've become alot closer. i really do want you to be happy and such. i love you so much and you're an awesome friend that i can come to with my problems and vice versa. i know you're not as hard as everyone thinks. you're a little softy and that's okay! i'm glad i know you from every angle and that i can understand you more now without judging you. I smile everytime i see your face foreal!
CLUE:BOOTSEY.

8.i met you over summer but i feel like we had this bond or connection, but it got tangled in the middle and it took awhile for us to untangle that, but i'm happy you're back in my life and i love that we're grrrreat friends. I'm glad you feel comfortable enough to talk to me about your PMS ahha. so when i get my cars it's me and you like i said.even though you may hurt my feelings sometimes when you say certain things. but i am jealous at times and i'm learning to deal with it. best online friend =D PIGGY!
CLUE:Shower head.

9.i love you baby! i can't wait to see you again =)i'm sorry if i'd ever hurt you and shit. but i'm glad that i can talk to you whenever and that you love me and i love you.
CLUE:Boner.

all these people are so great and i'm glad i met every single last one of you <3
you guys are a form of a bestfriend in different ways. you have characteristic of a best friend. so even though i don't wear my heart on my sleeve doesn't mean i don't love you =D

Entitled to be sad.

Bad day!

"That's what you get when you let your heart win"
i'm listening to that right now! Today was the last day of school before we went on our break for Thanksgiving. I'm glad cause school is hella boring. So after school my friend Jonathan came and i talked to him for like 4 minutes ahha, then he went with daven to the mall and i went to the rotc potluck. Well i didn't really make it there cause i started talking to kreesha about things then i started crying and i was embarrassed so i went home and cried more in the car. 2 hours errgh! I haven't cried so hard since my breakup with shanay :( i felt so unwanted and that i was a waste of another persons time. I tried my hardest to act cool, calm and collected. But i could only take so much and i just left and gave a half ass hug and said my goodbyes. I bet you were happy, HUH? i didn't exactly know why i was feeling like this and kreesha told me something that i'll always remember...(it's a secret) but it really opened my eyes to new things? i just have to look deeper within myself to figure out my real emotions and my real hurts and why everything happens. I just know that i'm done trying to impress you boo! come to me when your ready.

Btw, your silent comment hurt my feelings
just to let you know!

This is not at all how much i'm feeling blog more later =)

Kiwi

I want your sweet kiwi
ahha that sounds kinda nasty =D

Okay, stop bothering me already. Can't you take a hint that i don't want to talk to you or anyone involed. I don't want to get hurt again! so just leave me alone please!

AWW.

Awww i hate crying it creates un wanted pimples =/ BLAH this day has been an emotional one. my best friend Laurelle called me and was just venting about how she had no "REAL" friends or anyone who wants to care for her. Her college life is not good as far as friends and i felt so helpless, i had nothing to say to her. That made me feel like a bad friend and that i wasn't there for her. We both were complaining about how we feel alone and have no friends that care about us, but the thing is we have each other and i love her so much. i may not tell her alla time but i do. i hope she does too! She has her boyfriend and me and her besties at school. I have her and my 3 friends at school, plus my online friends who i never see. So we just feel alone but were not in reality. But she doesn't go to my school and i really do feel alone. I hangout with losers at lunch and i have nothing to do with my life =/ ehh
so anyway, i'm just fed up with people and want to have a frsh start. But anyways i hope she feels better cause i didn't do a great job. Good deep convo<333


Laurelle and i were just talking about how people annoy us and how we should start calling people out on their bullshit. but i'm scared to alittle cause everytime i do that i look like the bad guy. But lately i'm sick and tired of people's crap! UGGGH!
and johnny is just dumb i'm tired of his hard exterior. he's a fucking pussy on the inside. He needs to be shot! haha or stapped to death haha jkeeding. Also people i'm surrounded by have no fun! i want to do something new and spontaneous. HELP ME? Also Laurelle wants to just meet people her own age who want to be around her is that too much to ask for? Nut i don't know life is so confusing. I guess me and laurelle were complainign about being alone , but really like i said earlier we both actually have eachother and we over look the fact that we do care for one another , even though we bitch moan and complain about eachother alllla time! hah. I just want to feel like people want to get to know me, cause i hate having to walk passed someone i know on myspace and they ignore, that's the definition of a fake BITCH!

I

HATE LIARS
HOPE YOU'RE HAPPY
CAUSE I'M NOT

=/

That's what you get

Oh yesterday i went to the mall with katie to see my good friend william, that was all bad. i felt so bad cause like i was torn. I couldn't hangout with either one of them like by myself without feeling bad =/ but i think it's better now. It was nice seeing william though.


So it's been awhile since i last blogged. Hmmm? let's see i'll start with school, it's great right now i'm doing better then i've ever done before so that's good. friends are grrrrate too. i met a new one DENNISON =D he's nice and helpful when i need someone. i wanna meet him too. I learn something new everyday about people liking other people and it's kinda funny cause you would have never thought that they would be into eachother like that. But as for me liking people i try not to these days cause it gets me nowhere and just hurt, on top of that the people at school act like they don't wanna be friends with me but like right now i really don't care at all. I'm just gonna not bother and try to get their attention! I'm sad but i don't know why? "??????"

I feel so empty inside. Nothing there to cheer me up or to love me. I've been getting really pissed off lately about the smallest things at school,home, love,friends. I try to be the nice guy too much and it get's me nowhere with anyone.
I just want someone to talk to when i have like my problems, cause i just hide them and they build up then i cry like a baby haha. i basically feel alone in the world.

I have sinned
ENVY
GREED
SLOTH

damn i suck =D

Who?

well i have things to say to people so here it goes haha might be long.

First:Your getting cuter by the day =]
Second:i love you babygirl
Third:i really hope you find the one you're looking for and that you end up with a happy ending , like in 27 dresses!
Fourth:stop ruining your relationships and people's feelings
Fifth:decided what you want stop playing games with these two people
Sixth:stop! everyone knows already and stop doing NASTY things
Seventh:stop staring at me!!!!
eighth:alright, do you want to be my friend or not geeez. don't ignore me or walk by me and just look the other way. stop being so confusing
Nineth:You're a bitch whiteboy! everyone talks behind your back and i think you should know that no one wants to see your pubic hair nasty ass!
Tenth:why are you mean to me, i'm just trying to be nice

idk, more to come

can't get out.

of this octagon of love and it sucks , like i want to be friends with them all but honestly most of them get on my nerves. i try so hard to be nicer and understanding but some people need to understand that they are being stupid and bootsey (aaron's word)people want what they can't have and what they can have they don't want! that is so true these days, well atleast in my situation. there is a prodigious problem with everyone in my octagon! i just want out faaaast, and also if people know you're hiding something then might as well fucking share it with the world mister. stop being so damn scared of society. but yeah i don't know it makes me sad when my close friends are feeling down like j.p he is so awesome and i'm his good friend (i would hope) aha and i would hella stick up for him and it sucks that he got shit on by him , it truely does. i just get so down and stuff. i just don't like seeing people sad thats all. it kinda made me mad too!!!!

Teacher in Service.

today started off hella slow and stuff i ate and took a shower, i even cut my hair haha. i waited for my mom to drive me to hang out with Piggy and their friends. so i got to wilcox and i was helllllla lost and stuff then i seen Piggy and thier friends J and K their really fun and NASTY but i like it, it's so entertaining =) so we chilled at their school and stuff and i was so so shy, i hope they didn't notice, but i think they did! haha cause i was kinda quiet. but the we decided to walk to the mongolian bbq place which was hella far but a nice walk. i gave Pigy the bracelet i hope Piggy liked it =) then we ate and mine was so spicy daaammmnn! then after that we went to an asian market and the guy J said the worker was hella hot so we went to his station haha then i used the bathroom. then it was so dark and cold brrrrr! aha we walked k and j back to K's house and me and Piggy went to wilcox and sat down on the bench and talked about life i guess. it was good =) i'm glad we hung out all four of us haha. butyeah CUTTTTAAAAAAAYY ;)